Wednesday, 1 March 2017


OK, so I got diagnosed late last year with anxiety. Of course I'm not happy, (no offense).

For the past weeks it's increased, as they say, "taken out of your comfort zone" - why am I doing this writing now...? Ha. Bizarre.
I hate it (anxiety).

So, the whole job looking from last post [LINK], I'm "bricking it", term for, " chickening out" = I'm so afraid.
Why am I afraid?
For my reports, I take a while to learn, but do things goodly.
I'm good with customers. I take tasks "by the hand"...but why am I so scared...?

I've been out of work for 2years now - I do get asked, - but all it was, was trying to deal/get to know my health. Simple, right...?

This post is not for just a read I'm guessing, but - another "but" - just an outlet.
Taking in mind of, "realness" and just "updating" you as a reader.
I want things to be welcoming here.
So, hi! **waves frantic**.

 Adding to the struggle, I hardly know where I am until I realise it, but that's just another problem.
I know when it's there in my mind, but it's HOW to get out of it.
I tried breathing tech today...didn't work, only short hand (term) though.

Whatever is going on up there - my mind -, it better stop. Lollz.
I'm loving what I'm doing now, but it's making me feel like I CANT do it. Yup, feels.
Way down, I CAN do it, but all this "bundle mess" just needs to go.
I'm so out of it - not what you're thinking, I hope.

Tc to you.
I'm still here...messing with stuff. Huff.


P.S - taking in mind, I'm honest about my health to managers, AND on my CVs' (applications). Best thing, is to always be honest on your health.
Half (companies/staff) already know what to do :)

Tc again.

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